The Widow Hawthorne
About This Song
Words © 2012 Anne Prather. This song is a parody of "Day of Jubilee" music © 2008 Anne Prather
Song History
The Story
The poor, helpless original song
When I play in the Center City Parks, I always arrive good and early. This is because if an elevator isn't working, or an escalator is down, I need time to make a contingency plan for me and my 50 pounds' worth of gear.
The (unfortunate) result of my early arrivals is that most of the time I am left with nothing to do for half an hour while the harp comes to temperature. So I do what any good bard would do. I write.
The song you have here is about a poor unfortunate Web designer and developer who found herself the Webmistress of the zombie military supply requisition site. And yes, there's a story, Element 5.
There's panic in the cities
Plague victims stalk our towns
And in our nation's capital
No sanity is found.
The dead have started living
As dead never have before!
And we are all embroiled in
A fearsome zombie war!
We've retreated past the point of no return
And then beyond
We look around and wonder
Where our soldiers all have gone
And while we sit here wondering
The zombies rule the day
And they're threatening with every hour
To blow us all away!
If a zombie needs prosthetic hands
A helmet or a pill
He'll have to requisition them
From zsupplies dot mil.
Ms. Hawthorne is the Webmistress
Who works both day and night
Updating links and anchors
Till the whole damn site works right!
We've retreated past the point of no return
And then beyond
We look around and wonder
Where our citizens have gone
And while we sit here wondering
The zombies rule the day
They're threatening with every hour
To blow us all away!
It's Twelfth Night and she is desperate
In her tiny basement room
The widow's all that stands between
The living and their doom.
She misdirects links randomly
Each day one in n less 1
Till by Mardi Gras the site is toast
And the zombie army's done.
We have risen past the point of victory
And now beyond
We look around rejoicing
That the zombies now are gone
And the generals stand smiling
At the Widow Hawthorne's door
Saying "Thank you, Widow Hawthorne!
You have won the zombie war!"
We've risen past the point of victory
And then beyond.
We look around rejoicing
Now the zombies all are gone.
We see the power of the Webmistress
Like we've never seen before
In the tale of how the Widow Hawthorne
Won the zombie war!